“That’s enough of me talking about myself - let’s hear you talk about me!”
― Anonymous narcissist
“It’s not easy being superior to everyone I know!”

― Anonymous narcissist

The Mayo Clinic research group defines narcissistic personality disorder as “a mental disorder in which people have an inflated sense of their own importance and a deep need for admiration. Those with narcissistic personality disorder believe that they're superior to others and have little regard for other people's feelings. But behind this mask of ultra-confidence lies a fragile self-esteem, vulnerable to the slightest criticism.”

Here are eleven common narcissistic traits, excerpted from my book: “How to Successfully Handle Narcissists”:

Conversation Hoarder – Narcissists love to hear themselves talk, or hear others talk about them. They relish being the center of attention.

Conversation Interrupter – Many narcissists like to interrupt and switch the focus of communication to him or herself. He or she shows little genuine interest in you. 


“My father’s favorite responses to my views were: ‘but…,’ ‘actually…,’ and ‘there’s more to it than this…’ He always has to feel like he knows better.”
― Anonymous

Rule Breaker – Enjoy getting away with violating rules and social norms, such as cutting in line, chronic under-tipping, or disobeying traffic laws.
“I take pride in persuading people to give me exceptions to their rules.”
― Anonymous narcissist

Boundary Violator – Show wanton disregard for other people’s thoughts, feelings, time, possessions, and physical space.

False Image Projection – Like to do things to impress others by making themselves look good externally.

“My accomplishments are everything.”
― Anonymous executive
“What my mother displays in public and how she really is are very different.”
― Anonymous

Entitlement – ­Expect preferential treatment from others. Require others to cater (often instantly) to their needs, without being considerate in return. In their mindset, the world revolves around them.
“You’re sick? What about driving me to the mall?”
― Anonymous narcissist

Charmer – Narcissists can be very engaging and sociable, as long as you’re fulfilling what they desire, and giving them all of your attention.

Grandiose Personality – Some narcissists have an exaggerated sense of self-importance, thinking of oneself as a hero or heroine, a prince or princess, or one of a kind special person.
“Once again I saved the day - without me they’re nothing!”
― Anonymous narcissist

Superior/Inferior Orientation – Unable to relate to individuals as equals. Narcissists either take an inferior position and defer to you, or a superior position and presume that they’re in some ways better than you. Both the superior and inferior postures are calculated to sway you to give them what they want – such is the purpose of relationships to them.

Negative Emotions – Many narcissists enjoy spreading and arousing negative emotions to gain attention, feel powerful, and keep you insecure and off-balance.
“Some people try to be tall by cutting off the heads of others.”
— Paramhansa Yogananda

Manipulation: Use Others as Extension of Self – Narcissists often make decisions for others to suit their own needs. The narcissist may use his or her romantic partner, child, friend, or colleague to meet unreasonable self-serving needs, fulfill unrealized dreams, or cover up self-perceived inadequacies and flaws.

Many narcissists are oblivious to their negative and often self-destructive behavioral patterns, which typically result in them experiencing life lessons the hard way. Below are eight common life setbacks and failures of narcissists, with excerpts from my book: “A Practical Guide for Narcissists to Change Towards the Higher Self”. Negative consequence as the result of chronic narcissism may include one or more of the following:

1. Family Estrangement – Multiple studies have examined the relationship between narcissism and difficult family relationships.(1)(2)(3)(4)

2. Divorce – Research has also shown the tremendous negative impact narcissism has on romantic relationships and marriages.(5)(6)(7)(8)

3. Relationship Cut-Offs – Since narcissists “use” rather than “relate”, they tend to leave many broken relationships behind. Narcissists also experience relationship dissolution from others feeling let down, disappointed, lied to, used, manipulated, violated, exploited, betrayed, ripped-off, demeaned, invalidated, or ignored.

4. Loneliness and Isolation – Due to the first three factors described above, most narcissists have few, if any healthy, close and lasting relationships. Some higher-functioning narcissists achieve external success in life – at the expense of others – and find themselves lonely at the top.

5. Missed Opportunities – From a lack of true substance and/or connectedness.

6. Financial, Career, or Legal Trouble – From rule breaking, gross irresponsibility, careless indulgence, or other indiscretions.

7. Damaged Reputation – From personal and/or professional lack of credibility.

8. Deep-Seated Fear of Rejection / Being Unimportant – Many narcissists are easily upset at a­ny real or perceived slights or inattentiveness. They are constantly hounded by the insecurity that people may not see them as the privileged, powerful, popular, or “special” individuals they make themselves to be. Deep down, many narcissists feel like the “ugly duckling”, even if they painfully don’t want to admit it.